Elusive Island

Swimming in an ocean and you are the unreachable island.

You, my dream, why do you elude me?

I’m swimming backwards just get to you!

But time is moving forward and you just drift further away with every stroke.

The waves engulf my tears as I float.

I am still here and the island I have is enough.

I just need to swim back to it and remain.

I just need to take good care of my island.

Perhaps in doing so it will flourish up so well that I won’t notice the one that eludes me.




I cried so hard when I realized I may have truly lost you,

You meant so much to me.

Both joy and pain stored in your charming presence,

It took so long to “earn” you,

I still remember sitting back that first Christmas watching the other girls flaunting theirs hoping you’d show up for me to do the same.

It wasn’t a superficial thing to me, it was spiritual or symbolic rather,

See if you had arrived then I’d know things were official,

Showing up that Christmas would have meant I was “in”,

I would be a part of the family,

It meant commitment to you being on my arm and growing every year,

But you didn’t show up.

I just knew then I wasn’t yet “that” wanted or needed,

I wasn’t “the one” truly just yet.

But I’ll never forget the day you finally did make your debut,

It wasn’t at Christmas time as I had expected,

It was two years later,

After a long day of working on my birthday,

I came home feeling I had been forgotten,

My birthday wasn’t important enough,

And to my surprise there you were,

In the kitchen waiting for me!

I was so elated as I opened the Jared’s bag and saw you laying in the box waiting for me,

You shined so brilliantly with my first 4 charms on you,

The heart with my opal birthstone,

The family charm and two place holder charms,

Finally I knew it was official between my fiancé and I,

Though he had given me my ring the year prior,

This, this really meant he was in it for the long haul.

Yet, it still took another 2 years before you ever got another charm to add to your brilliance.

You are a symbol of our journey,

Our first anniversary,

My 30th birthday,

And now our first child together.

So when you went missing my world went crashing down.

I could always get another one but it will never be like my original.

Thank God you showed up in my pocket,

Once again when I least expected it,

And I jumped for joy!

Even more excited than the first day I got you!

It had been over a month since I could remember seeing you last.

Now I’m much more cautious and conscious of where I put you down.


No more making a fool out of myself for what I wished existed in places I don’t belong, 

What’s real is right here and right now and right in front of me, 

It’s not running nor needing to be chased but rather just waiting to be embraced,

Love my love,  my Love loves me!
-Mrs. Mills, yeah that’s Me

I’m Grateful For: Pattern 


Pit pit patter

Pat pat pitter


You got a


Ever ending


Old habits die hard

Your pattern leaves scars

On  hearts

Like tire marks from cars

But you never mean to

You just do what you feel you have to

Don’t get discouraged Beau

Just do you

Let them mark your pattern

As long as

You own the consequences you earn

From your

I’m grateful for, recognizing and owning my pattern.

Excuse Me

Baby let me whisper in your ear,
Darling you are not perfect but you are the best thing I know,
Sweet heart they’ll never love you like me,
Because honey they just don’t know you like me,
You don’t have a perfect body,
But you sure do have it going on in my eyes,
That smile of yours lights up my eyes,
You might not always be the sweetest,
But you’re sweet enough for me,
Yes you’ve got things to work on,
But I’m in love with your mind,
Your heart may be tarnished,
But it’s value is still priceless,
So when others come and try to rock your world,
You just remember how much I love you,
Don’t let them get too close,
I’m the one for you,
Yes you, you there in the mirror



Ms. Me

Jazmine Sullivan – Excuse Me (Audio): http://youtu.be/OVyB-ai9z3I

(Written May 12, 2014)

What Are We?

Let’s keep it low key,
We don’t even have titles,
But I’m feeling entitled,
I hate that, my mind goes there
And you’re tempting even when you’re not here,

Am I committed solely to an idea?
Or is this actually a possibility?

Rubbing your back
Feeding your belly
Helping get your hair right
All these bring me pleasure it’s true
But the question remains where do I stand with you?

It’s like a game and I don’t want to get pinched trying to squeeze my way out.

(Written March 13, 2016)

Falling in Love With Me

I just want to fall in love again,

Fall in love again,  fall in love again,

With who I am, who I am.

So let me free, let me free again,

To blow in the wind.

Because I can’t be tamed, I can’t.

So let me free again,

To fall in love with who I am.


(Written October 2, 2016)